Category Food

If Pizza is a Vegetable, So is Cake.

Sometimes I want to eat vegetables. Sometimes I want to eat dessert. Sometimes I want to eat a whole jar of pickles and follow it up with a Chipwich from the 7-11 while crying on the couch watching The Labyrinth. And I’m not even pregnant yet. Anyway, when the desire for fiber and the desire […]

Homemade Caramel DeLites

It’s almost Girl Scout Cookie season! I fully support the GSA. Their mission and their work with young girls is inspiring and commendable. I am certainly not opposed to buying a couple boxes of cookies every year to support their organization. But I do not know anyone who has GSA-aged daughters. And there comes a […]

Gluten-Free Flour Roundup

Living with someone who does not eat gluten, and also being a person who would do depraved things for a cookie, I have a lot of experience cooking and baking with gluten-free alternatives to flour. I have tried almost everything in my baking experiments to get my bread dough to stretch nicely, my cookies to bake […]

Why is (Chocolate) A “Girl Thing?”

Today’s post is brought to you my: My Period! You’ve probably heard the stereotype that woman love them some chocolate. If you’ve never heard this stereotype, please click on over to a stock photography website, search for “woman chocolate” and then try and tell me it doesn’t exist, you little shit. The advertising industry knows […]

A Lady’s Guide to (More) Whey Protein

As I have mentioned before, I am a fan of protein powder. It helps me fill in my protein macros for the day, and it’s a good on-the-go emergency meal or snack for days when I fucking forgot my lunch bag on the kitchen counter and now I’m already on the highway and if I […]


If you, like me, are in graduate school right now, then you, like me, are too busy shitting your pants 100% of the time to think about cooking. Let alone, God forbid, cooking anything that requires actual cleanup. But man cannot live on Easy Mac alone. Sometimes you need real food – food that didn’t […]

Cake or Death

My mom and I are basically the biggest inhaler-wielding nerds on the planet. I have a nut allergy that makes me puff up like a blowfish if anyone puts their nuts near my face (which, believe me, I have been hearing jokes about since we were way too young to even understand what they meant) […]